Wonky's Land of Nonsensical Musings

Category: TMI

A Series of Disasters

Recently life has been beset but what are a mostly comical series of disasters.

The man gets his money

The day I went to go see the Peter Frampton concert, I opened the mailbox to a very large envelope in the mail. Along the return address were the words so many American fear, Internal Revenue Service. With more anger than fear I ripped open the envelope.  Hadn’t they taken enough? They clearly didn’t think so.  I had a bill for more money.  I didn’t have time that day to check to see if their calculations were correct.  I did go through my records later and realize they were probably right.  After a short consultation with a nice woman from the IRS I realized I would have to pay.. Grrr

Never look a gift horse in the worn out gasket

You all remember the free clothes washer I got a month or so back. After my fifth or sixth load I walked into the small utility room the put the clothes in the dryer and promptly slid across the floor. The floor was covered in about a glasses worth of water.  I turned off the water to the washer and mopped up the floor.  I checked and it looked liked one of the ancient hoses was leaking a little. About  a week or so later I finally bought some new hoses and installed them.  I put a load of laundry in  and I waited in the utility room as the washer did it’s job.  I am alarmed to here a splashing sound as water starts leaking out of the bottom of the washer.  I turn the water off at the hoses and start trying to figure out what is wrong with the thing.  It eventually stops leaking and I manage to get the washer through the cycle. Checking online it sounds like I might have a bad agitator gasket.  I am not going to pay someone to fix a twenty year old washer I got for free.  So I’ve begun the process of taking apart the washer myself if I can see what is wrong with it. 

Who needs level pictures anyway

I have been wanting to get some shots with my camera trying out a new idea of mine.  For this I wanted to have the camera on my tripod.  I went outside and pulled the lever to release one of the legs. Oh it released alright.  It fell right out of the socket and clattered to the ground.  I couldn’t believe it. I tried to fit the leg back into the socket when another leg fell off.  Finally the middle piece dislodged and bits of broken plastic cascaded to the cement.  Seeing as I was standing about ten feet from a dumpster I picked up the mess and tossed it in.

 You get what you pay for lesson 3

I needed to put a new item on my wall so I had to drill a few pilot holes for the drywall anchors.  I dragged out my old cordless drill.  Being me I had purchased the cheapest one on offer a few years ago.  I plugged the battery into the charger and was greeted by the familiar red light indicating charging. I went off to do some stuff while it charged. Upon my return I was met with the smell of burning electronics and the charging light was dead.  The wall charger almost burned my hand when I yanked it out of the wall to stop a fire from starting.  Needless to say the battery was not charged and the drill is useless.  I never liked that drill anyway.

TMI WARNING you probably don’t want to read this!.. who knew cats could get constipated.

I had noticed that my fuzzy little ball of annoyance seemed to be more unhappy than usual. Also I watched him several times try to use the litter box without success.   I planned to take him to the vet the next day.  I didn’t need to. I was met the next morning with a nice pile of cat poop.. .in the middle of the living room.  My worries that he would stop using his box were unfounded as he spent the next couple of weeks happily regular.  But that didn’t last.  He was exhibiting the same signs as before.  I called the vet and got some advice on what I could do.  I came home from work and again could stop worrying.  This time the giant poop pile was in the bed.  I warned you not to read this 🙂

If you want to know what advice I got it was to start feeding him some canned gooshy food and had a tablespoon or two of pumpkin to it.  He loves his new dinners and eats up all the pumpkin.  Important warning: make sure to buy plain canned pumpkin NOT the stuff for pumpkin pie.  Cats cannot digest sugar and it quickly will cause feline diabetes. Note I am not a veterinarian and you should not do anything I’ve said. 

I wonder how many posts on blogger have  “constipated cat” as a label?  No I am not going to check.

A hypochondriac with a long term health issue walks into a bar

I admit there will be no bars in this post.  I may have mentioned it in an earlier post but I am a hypochondriac. I also don’t like going to doctors which makes for an odd combination. Under normal circumstances it is annoying if easy to deal with. Get a rash and run to the internet to find the worst possible diagnoses ever.  A headache is obviously a tumor. I once convinced myself that I had one of the rarest forms of cancer known. TMI(turned out I was constipated)

When I am actually suffering from a medical condition the ol’ hypochondria can kick into overdrive. I am in treatment for a long term health issue. No I won’t tell you what it is.  If you should know you probably already do. It is six months since I was diagnosed.  My doctor cheered me up by telling me he had the same thing and it took two years for it to clear up. Thanks doc.

Like with many long term health issues, mine ebbs and flows. Sometimes I am symptom free, and other times it gets worse. When the symptoms get worse in walks our good friend, hypochondria. “Dude that doctor is probably a quack.  You really should search the internet for horrible diseases to self diagnose.”  “You should really alter the medication you are taking.”  The slightest twinge of pain or discomfort causes concern.  Back or neck hurts slightly.  “You didn’t sleep wrong. You are riddled with disease that will not be treatable.”

I have found a few good ways to deal with Mr. Hypochondriac.  Go out, find some friends, and have some fun.  It also helps to watch/listen to something light that makes you laugh. I have been getting a lot of traction from an old podcast that started in 2006. The Katia and Kyliemac podcast was ostensibly about their lives in France but is mostly just a funny and hilarious bit of banter. It ran for about six years before sadly shutting down last year.

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